They say that parenting is a mirror, and will bring up all our unresolved issues.
I read that before I was a mama, and I totally got it. Intellectually. Abstractly.
They say there is no bond like a parent-child.
I got that. Abstractly. Intellectually.
Here’s what I now understand about what that really means.
Intellectually understanding something is next to meaningless.
To really be impacted by something, to have it make you change and grow, it has to be felt, with an open heart.
To have an open heart, we have to have something happen for us, that breaks it open.
This world, so cruel and harsh at times, makes many of us shut down.
We build walls. We protect. We hide our truth and pretend to be strong.
We don’t let it in, for that would seem weak. And whatever you do, don’t cry.
What I now know is that having Sophia primed my heart chakra. It was a necessary and vital part of my journey, and opened my heart up more fully to receive more than anything else likely could have.
When we love that much, when we feel with an open heart, when we allow ourselves to be touch and transformed by love, then, naturally, all that is not love will rise to the surface.
So, in the face of my innocent and perfect daughter, in the face of her love, joy and grace, I see all the places I harbor anger, sadness, grief, judgment.
A process of healing has occurred in which I am coming more solidly into my Self, my center, my heart.
I am dwelling in the tender, open, expanse of heart energy.
This allows me to love and be loved, and give and receive, and to let go of all that has come before- walls- that prevented me from truly living in love.
So you see, what I now know is that the reason having a child shows us our darkness and where we need to grow, is that it opens our heart and allows us to feel again, or more fully. This edges out all that can not survive in the wake of that light.
The bond with our child primes our heart chakra, and opens up a new readiness to receive.
This is why that bond is so powerful, if we so choose to allow it to open us, it is the greatest love ever known, a fulfilling primary partnership and allows us to feel with an open heart. This, is the only way to feel.
To your open, feeling heart + its reception of all it’s ready to receive,