I once had a boyfriend who I’m not sure I even liked.
He was charming and sexy and charismatic and very forward in his pursuit of me. I found this enchanting, as most people would, for I think many of us love attention.
Isn’t that what we all want? To be noticed, seen, adored and cared for?
As our relationship developed, I was one part aloof and one part intrigued.
I spent many weeks on my therapists couch citing how I just didn’t even like him. We didn’t seem to align on many of our values and there were many red flags.
I kept going, anyway.
The problem is that sometimes we have a psychological fear that runs the show that says, “Something is better than nothing.”
We think that we’ll be alone, and on a very real, first Chakra level, this is true and quite valid, for in our past, and certainly in our ancient history, being alone meant death.
Now, however, it’s the new age. It’s an age of higher consciousness and this means coming out of first chakra survival needs and into the upper chakras.
Relationships, now, could ideally be based on love and connection and a desire to give of oneself from a full cup.
So, what can we do?
1. Make it conscious
Shine the light of our consciousness on what’s really happening when we are tied to another, or stuck in a pattern with someone.
Expand our energy. Own our power.
2. Start asking questions
Good questions to ask are:
- What’s really going on here beneath the surface that I’m not getting?
- What’s right about this that I’m not seeing?
- Who does this belong to?
- Is this mine?
Sometimes, we just want to be wanted, more than we want to give from the generosity of our heart.
Sometimes, we’re acting out old patterns & having ancient feelings that aren’t even ours.
When we are coming from place of want or need, vs. giving from our bounty because it feels so good, we end up in a power struggle.
All of life and all of our relationships can be boiled down to one thing: Power.
Life is about power, either perceiving that we don’t have it and giving it away, or vying for control so that we think we are in power.
From the time we were little, most of us felt the power others had over us. We internalized the abuse coming our way, and we perceived that we were powerless, unworthy, unloved.
Now, it is our charge to reclaim our power, to be fully present, embodied, to stop giving our power away simply by perceiving erroneously that we DON’T have any, and understand that we have CHOICE and we are far more aware than we realize.
Being in our bodies, here and now, and owning our awareness, will allow the light of consciousness to shine, and will allow us to be fully empowered beings, conscious, awake, and in our juicy, delicious, natural state!
To be juicy, radiant & sweet, we have to give space, we have expand our awareness and our energy & we have to be HONEST about where we’re stuck and contracted, or, in other words: IN JUDGMENT.
3. Give up judgment
Everywhere we are in judgment of ourselves or others, we are limiting our awareness, for how could we not be? We’re assuming we know and we’re cutting off other possibilities.
This is a surrender of our power.
Know why you’re acting the way you are. Know when you’re cutting off awareness.
Be willing to be different. Let your juicy energy flow. It’s a choice. Quit choosing misery, limitation & lack.
Be the flower unto the honey bee.
If you’d like support in shining the light on the unconscious patterns at play, keeping you playing small, get a reading!
To your authentic power and your radiant juice!
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